The Beckoning Of Lovely
by My heart is 75 jily
Summary: Of the happily ever after they deserved but didn't get. Of war and terror and loss and death. Of tranquility and madness and realisations and arguements. Of pure chance and of meant to be. Of the impulsive and the sweet. Of the cocky and the witty. Of James and Lily. A Maruaders era fic.
1. Chapter 1

**Preface**

"And they kissed. And it was a truely legitimate kiss considering neither of them was drunk or half-asleep. Nobody was half-naked or filled with the "I see you and I want you and I must have you now" lust. Neither of them was dizzy or more importantly,  
out-cold. The nausea was just from the near-death experience and the fact that the state this world was in nearly always made her sick to watch. And, the biggest reason possibly was that they were not dead. Oh. OH. They weren't dead when they almost  
were but weren't quite. When they were in the middle of a war, not only against nature itself, but from the terrifying dominating instinct all us wee-pathetic-humans seem to have. When all we've done for years is ignore the fact that this instinct  
is real and subtle and destructive and laughed at it as if the whole universe hasn't been trying to make us survive since the dawn of time. They weren't dead when lately everyone was. And don't get me wrong, she wrote, it wasn't the "everything faded  
away as we kissed and we were the only two people left in the world" kind of kiss, because after all, their oh-so-tragic death experience was FOR their world and its people. Which a lovesick author might've tried to write in a lovesick novel as a  
complication, where the fact that they were almost-but-not-really dead and they probably had little time left and they were in the middle of a war and they might die any moment were reasons NOT to love- which she, not a poet or a writer, but a warrior,  
thought was utter bullshit. Because being together might be the thing willing her to fight and survive, that and the fact that she had been loving herself far longer than him and even more longer, her family, and more love was just gonna make everyone  
stronger. Because just a little bit of love was better than no love at all, especially since it was pure. Because struggling to survive was not gonna work forever. Because this war wasn't the fictional zombie-filled future...which in hindsight might've  
been easier to face, but the very present they lived in, filled with darkness and the fight against who used to be like their family, against the death wish those ignorant dark wizards don't realise they have, if they don't realise it soon." She looked  
at an exhausted James lying beside her, covered in scratches and bruises, but contently snoring, and bent once again over her diary. "Because they were fighting this war with love, weren't they?" 


	2. Chapter 2

**He Thinks of Her**

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 **DISCLAIMER:** I do not own any of the characters, just the story and the writing. Everything else belongs to the Queen, J.K. Rowling.

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Being who he was, he couldn't exactly express his love- no,not love, like, huge crush, mild obsession maybe- for her in so many words, he couldn't face the depth of his feelings, which could very well have been love but he didn't know love at just  
/16- to himself or to anyone, which is probably what a girl like her deserved. But then again, he was James Potter. The James potter who had, on a dare (from Sirius of course, who else!?) gone into Dumbledore's office, conjured up an actual mariachi  
/band in front of Dumbledore (wearing that fancy top hat too, Sirius had added with a smirk), danced the whole of the macarena and walked out without an explanation. Dumbledore, being Dumbledore, hadn't even demanded one, just transfigured

some toffee into pop corn and sat on his desk with his legs folded. James amused himself for a while, thinking of his victorious "HA! HA! And HA!" In Sirius's face upon his return, but in the end his train of thought came back to where it started,  
/to HER. It always did.

He imagined her deep, wild green eyes locking with his, pure fury emanating like a storm, as she yelled words he didn't hear, lost in her flowing hair streaking wildly over her stiff shoulders trying not to show her barely contained, almost sobbing  
/emotions. All this from the fateful day last term, when her greasy snivelly best- no, EX best friend (he found a very guilty but satisfactory pleasure in these words) had dared to open his filthy mouth to say what he knew had been coming for awhile,  
/HE could see Snape's self, which had been just introverted and friendless before, changing into a cunning, war lord persona who wanted followers, not friends. James was very much glad that Lily was no longer Snape's mate, although sad by how much  
/it crushed her , but he was also very, very ANGRY and very much stupefied, how snape could let the best thing to ever happen to him, scratch that, the best thing to happen to this falling world, get away with something so so miniscule and stupid  
/and outrageous. James felt overwhelmed at the complexity of his emotions and almost fell out of his seat in the Hogwarts express, into Remus's lap as a familiar, not as sharp as it used to be but still with a tinge of the usual impatience, said  
/loudly "Potter!"

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Heyyyy guys and gals and anyone who's patient enough and awesome enough to read this!

This is my very first attempt at writing something and I really really hope you guys like it! So if you enjoyed, or if you think it was even OKAY enough to be worth posting, please review!

Yours waiting and scared,

Anushka


	3. Chapter 3

**Could You Be ANY More Obvious!?**

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 **DISCLAIMER:** I do not own any of the characters, just the story and the writing. Everything else belongs to the Queen, J.K. Rowling.

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James sheepishly looked around at the red haired girl standing before him, looking half amused and half exasperated. She was wearing a short, tight fitting black jumper that hung a bit off the shoulder, showing her smooth, white neck which

looked brilliant in contrast wth her bright red hair, along with blue jeans that showed off her legs that went on for a million years.

But what really made him give her a smile of a thousand suns, the one specially reserved for her, was the fact that her jumper said the words "Certified Fangirl✔️". He grinned. "Hey Evans!"

Everyone looked at him in disbelief, Sirius rolling his eyes, smirking.

"Mate, we've been calling your name for ages. Specially me! ME! You don't wake from your trance when I call your name but you do when SHE does!?" He said, faking indignation. "Is it because she's better looking than I am? Because I have

better hair!...no offense Evans, but yours make you look like a...a...err...what has a red top?" He enquired from his fellow marauders, who had learned by now to completely ignore him when he went into his rants.

"You were drooling Prongs." Remus said matter of factly. "Care to tell us what that was all about?"

James blushed, "Err not really, it was just a aszhs ... umm..." They all laughed, Peter shaking silently and adding, "Well that was specific".

"Okayy moving on...", James mumbled.

"Well, Potter if you're done with your dreamscapes, I'd like to invite you to your inevitable demise." Lily finally offered, grimacing. "Slug horn has told me to invite you along to one of his "Sluggies" happening in the third compartment

right about now, and I know you managed to escape it in fourth year, I should warn you, he's pretty determined this time.

Appearently he figured out that you are a person who would NOT be persuaded with promises of meeting the Minister of Magic." She made a quite interesting face.

"A HEN!" Sirius yelled in triumph.

"Oo sorry Evans, you're quite a cute hen if it helps." He opened his mouth wide in a smile which would've made another girl swoon, but which made lily give him a piercing glare, while trying to hide her amusement, and which made his friends roll  
/their eyes in a "I've had too much of Sirius for today" way.

"So what DID he find that made him try to capture the rare being that is James once again?", Sirius inquired, interested once again in their conversation. "Well...". Lily looked down, blushing. Everyone sat up.

"...he sent me"

She grinned apologetically. Remus and Sirius exchanged looks and tried to clear the sudden avoiding-eye-contact and clearing-of-throats going on.

Sirius coughed and said in his usual, jaunty manner, "Well.. this is awkard so we're gonna just blow right past it!"

Lily smiled and turned once again to James, "So, you've been warned. I'll just be going then so come over there if you want to."

She marched out of the compartment with her head high and her hands in her pockets. James looked once at his mates, trying to contain their smiles and Sirius even stuffing his face with his fist, and knew a bombardment of questions was coming.  
/He jumped up before they could start about who he was "dream-doing" before, as Sirius liked to call it, and almost ran out of the door, calling after Lily to wait up.

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Heyy guys! I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and I hope it was enough to make you want to come back for another one!  
 **Jily alllll the way-** Thank you so much! I hope you like the rest of the story as much as the prologue!  
 **Diya-** Aww , that's really awesome of you! Thank you veryyy much!  
Guys, you'll never know how motivating your words are. Thank you for your awesomeness!  
Yours over-the-top happy at 2 reviews,  
Anushka


	4. Chapter 4

**Did She Really Say That!?**

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 **DISCLAIMER:** I do not own anything except the story and the writing. The wonderful characters belong to the Queen, J.K. Rowling.

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He caught up to her with little difficulty, thanks to his lean body from playing quidditch since he could walk. Lily turned around once, and upon seeing him grinning foolishly, hid her smile.

"So...you came!", she smirked. James let out a lamenting sigh and said,"Yeahh I guess Slughornknows what he's doing now. It's kind of pathetic that his "plan" would work so quickly!"

Lily rolled her eyes at him. She did seem to do that a lot in his presence, he mused.

"Well, anyway, how was your summer?" He said after a silence, not awkard for her, but sufficiently unbearable for him. "Hmm lets see. My dad died, leaving me and my mom alone because then Petunia decided to move out and now I'm back at school withmy  
ex best friend getting more and more nearer to the pit of the dark side, more closer everyday to falling inside!" She said bluntly, hoping to shut him up.

But he just ran his hand through his stupid, amazing hair and looked at her regretfully.

"I'm truely sorry, Lily, because I know what you're mad about isn't all these things happening in your life, which you totally do not deserve, but because you cannot do anything about it, and you have to stand here instead chit chatting with me

about your summer. And that isn't the way it should be".

Lily stared at him, not in awe or anything, just trying to figure out how an arrogant bullying toe rag could become a person like him right now in matter of a few months. She knew that he still would punch Snapein the face if given the opputunity,buthe  
had really changed, as a person living in a world where war had become a generation of no positive outcome in sight. She tried to figure out if he was just saying it toappease/ taunt/ woo her, but somehow that felt to her as her being unreasonableand  
narrow minded in her assumptions than just afact about him in her everyday life like it had been before. He was genuine and she was genuinely starting to like him, which scared her in a wonderfully euphoric way a roller coaster does.

She suddenly realised she had stopped walking and was staring at him like he was a crossword puzzle with no clues in sight. She blinked and turned her head in front once again, shaking her head slightly.

She could almost hear him smiling behind her, with a too all-knowing look on his face for her liking.

She clapped her hands in an all-buisness manner, "Cmon potter! We haven't got all day!" He jumped and started following her once again.

"So let's forget all that depressing stuff for a moment. I just wanted to let you know how much I liked that top on you!", he said, grinning sloppily. She glared at him sideways. He wondered how that sounded and said hastily,"No! I mean I liked  
your sweatshirt! It says Certified Fangirl and that certainly amuses me a great deal!"

"Well it's no laughing matter! We take our fandoms very seriously, and no boy should ever try to assume otherwise !" She said, thinking he was making fun of her. He stared at her for a while, trying to figure out how he messed up so bad that she wouldimmediately  
think his complement was a taunt. He remembered all those times he had almost cried over a *insert epic 20th century author* novel, and admitted that he might just be a fanboy himself, and had felt rather ashamed. But he loved those words

now, he KNEW what it meant to be so in love with a book that you lose your reality and while he certainly wasn't a nerd or a geek, he now felt a freeing sense of satisfaction as he admitted he definitely WAS a fanboy.

He smiled sadly at her. "Well we fanboys don't like to be told that fandoms aren't serious either, so watch out Evans!"

She looked at him, shocked.

He now grinned genuinly, "Why, yes Evans! The popular, unattainable James Potter, while definitely not a nerd,is a fanboy! Why are you so surprised?"

She analysed him for a minute, as if trying to work out in her head if he was true enough to be titled a fanboy. After a minute or two, she shrugged, and said, "Well can you blame me? It certainly is good to know that you know how to read Potter!"  
/He guffawed, again doing the annoying, super cute messy hair thing.

"Well, anyways, we're here now. And I think it's best for YOUR reputation that we don't go in together, otherwise people will find out your weakness!", she said, winking slyly.

He gaped at her. She started to slide inside the door, but turned around for a last word, "And Potter, if it makes any difference, I don't think it's pathetic."

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Heyy I hope you enjoyed that chapter! I'm trying to post 2 chapters at a time for as long as I can, so wish me luck!

Yours, with cookies and love,

Anushka


	5. Chapter 5

**The Beginning**

 **Disclaimer: Every character in this story belongs to the queen jkr. I'm just the puppeteer of an amaeture story.**

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"Yes, James. She walked with you. She talked to you without jinxing your ass. Her beauty, her grace, her melodious voice...you already did this part! Can't you get you brain to move along any faster so we all can get back to doing nothing?" Remus  
finally said with a yawn, having given all his limited patience to listen to James yap about the love of his life.

"No, no, don't tell my brain what to do!" James said, frowning. Then, with his eyes melting with frightening quickness, and his voice going sappy in a way the made all 3 of his fellow marauders roll their eyes, he said, "My HEART is the one talking right  
now!"

The boys groaned loudly as they slowly went back to their previous position, James smiling contentedly and starting again on how perfectly she had winked at him as she passed him in the corridor of the train just a half an hour ago, on her way to  
the carriages.

The boys were sitting in their dorm, while the rest of Hogwarts was in the Dining Hall, halting on their way to dinner so as to fulfil the tradition of their "Back to School Prank", waiting for the time when dinner would reach their starving bellies with  
its magnificent feast of Dragon Tartare, Goblin Pies, Steak and kidney pies with lamb chops and huge platters of meringues and chocolate pumpkins for dessert.

They would wait for 10 more minutes , and then as the 1001 balloons hidden in the nooks and crannies of the ginormous castle went off consequetively, they would make their grand entrance.

Finally after having checked the map for any sign of Filch or his god- forsaken cat, they made their way to the Hall. After sneaking multiple glances in Dumbledore's direction (Mcgonagall was not at the table, having left huffing and puffing in anger  
at a noise that sounded like crazy farts) they stocked their plates with turkey sandwiches and little jam-filled pop tarts (just for starters) and looked as innocent as was possible for 4 teenage wizards- no, sorry, MARAUDERS to look after pissing  
off the most badass witch of all time.

After a long while of echoes of spoons and forks and laughter, Dumbledore stood up and clinked his glass. He looked so fierce, yet welcoming with his robes swishing and his pure white beard shining in the candlelight.

"Welcome, my dear children! To another year at Hogwarts! I am heartened to see your full and sleepy faces, but bear with the old man for a few minutes, as I make a few important announcements. As always, I'd like to inform the new students, and  
remind the older ones, that it is FORBIDDEN to go into the forbidden forest." He winked in the marauders direction. They blinked back at him innocently. "Mr. Filch would like you to check out the list on his door, so you could know all the 704 things  
you are NOT allowed to do in the castle.

And lastly, my dear children, I know all of you are aware that dark times are upon us, and I would request you all to work, think and fight together to get the Wizarding World out of this mess.

But for now, seeing as you can barely keep your eyes open, off you go to the warmth of your bed and the innocence of your dreams!"

After this dramatic ending, the students went off to their dormitories, chattering and yawning, with arms linked together, and to their warm beds, and as the moon rose up in the sky slowly, yet another year at Hogwarts began.

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Thank you guys soooo much for reviewing and keeping my confidence up! It's means a LOT to me and I'm sorry it's been so long. I'll try to be more regular! I promise! Btw another chapter coming up!

Yours stressed yet happy,

Anushka


	6. Chapter 6

**The first day**

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 **Disclaimer:** Nothing except the story belongs to me. The rest is ALLL credit to the queen jkr!

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"We're gonna be late you guys!"

Remus's voice rang out in the deserted corridor of Hogwarts castle, foreboding enough to make the three tousled boys behind him burst into laughter.

"We're already late Moony, even if we run we're gonna reach late. So why not make the best of the rarely empty castle and go have a picnic in the common room!" The panting voice of a grinning Sirius said enthusiastically.

"It's the first day", Remus said disapprovingly.

Just then a grinning James caught up to them, dragging along with him the sleepy, chubby form of Wormtail, and burst into laughter saying, "No Sirius. Moony is right. The least we could do is take the first day of class...siriusly!" Remus chuckled  
feebly, nervously checking his watch once again.

"You just wanna check out Red at the one time of the day when she can't hex you!", Sirius pouted. James sobered up instantly and gazed back at his best mate innocently.

"C'monnnnn!" Remus said, exsparated.

As they entered Mcgonagall's class together, trying to make their expressions as cute and heart-melting as possible, James eyes wandered as usual to the red-haired girl sitting next to the window, her green eyes reflecting the sun rays but not hiding  
her irritation at the interruption . He immediately looked away.

"May I be such a bother as to ask your highnesses why on earth have they lowered themselves as to enter my classroom?" asked an annoyed and exsparated voice, the voice of Minerva Mcgonagall.

"Well, good morning to you too Minnie! You know we could never miss seeing your face in the morning, you minx!" Sirius flashed a gorgeous smile at her, which made half the girls sitting in the front row sigh.

"Your flattery isn't gonna get you anywhere in the real world, Mr. Black." Mcgonagall said, looking a little pacified despite her words. "Kindly take your seats."

"As you've been told multiple time in the past, the spell for human transfig- excuse me, Mr. Snape, why are you looking at the door when I am standing right here, and believe it or not, not talking to myself!?". Mcgonagall said, her glasses flashing menacingly.

"Sorry Professor." Snape said dully, sounding like he hadn't even heard her.

Soon, the bell rang for lunch. Lily Evans sauntered out of her potions class, laughing merrily at something her best mate, Marlene McKinnon had just whispered to her. However, as soon as she saw the shadow of a sallow-faced greasy-haired thin boy sitting  
down, looking deep in thought, her smile was replaced by a frown.

"What's wrong Lils?", asked Marlene, concerned at the sudden look of sadness at her friend's face.

"Nothing Marl... It's just that...have you noticed how Snape has been looking so down latel-"

Marlene cut her off before she could even finish her sentence.

"Don't even say it Lily. What that guy does is none of our goddamn business anymore. I HAVE noticed it, and I'm really freaking glad, after what he said to you last year!"

Lily sighed.

"Yeah you're right. I just can't help wondering about it, we did used to share everything...okay okay babe I wont say anymore!" She said, silenced by the look Marlene gave her. "C'mon, let's go to lunch. I'm starving!"

A few steps away from them was a messy-haired boy with glasses on his eyes and misery on his face, having snatched the last part of the conversation and been able to understand. Understand that Lily still cared about that miserable excuse of existence.  
Understand that the girl he probably loved would never stop caring about him.

"Why does she have to STILL notice him!? Wasn't everything that happened last year enough proof to her about what a piece of utter greasy shit he is!?"James ranted to his friends later that evening, making sure that the girl sitting across the  
common room, with laughter in her eyes and concentration on her crinkly nose would not hear him.

He would never be able understand, maybe, how much and "HOW EVEN" had Lily come to care for Severus Snape. But he would understand, much much later, how that poisonous little shit had been a friend to her, and probably would have been much more if he  
wasn't an idiot, and James would thank his lucky stars that everything happened the way it did. Even in the afterlife, after the day everything went disastrously wrong, James would know how much it was meant to be, and he would be right, because James  
would have started believing, much later than this moment when he cursed Snape's existence, in fate.

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Here's me keeping my promise to post 2 chapters at once! Only for a while tho...

Yours sleepy as hell,

Anushka


	7. Chapter 7

_**Something That Needs To Be Done**_

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 **DISCLAIMER: I do not own anthingexcept for the story and the writing. Everything else belongs to the queen JKR.**

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"Lily...Hey Lilyy... LILY!" Marlene took the red-headed girl sitting beside her at the Gryffindor table by the shoulder and violently shook her out of her daze.

"Here I am telling you about the really random and epic story of the Arab man whose goat was living in my house without my knowledge, and you are sitting there like I'm inflicting some kind of mind-numbing torture on you, the kind that makes you go so  
still that you forget you are a human and you refuse to believe your apparent existence... I read about it in a book..." Marlene waved her hands in a manner implying that this dialogue wasn't totally befuddling to her best-est friend in the whole  
world.

"What kinds of things do you know..." Lily looked at her suspiciously, thinking of possibilities ranging from police academy to prisons. Marlene snapped her fingers in front of Lily's mildly concerned and deeply suspicious eyes.

"You're completely missing the point! Wait...were you thinking about that greasy snake Snape again?" She asked suddenly. Lily looked guilty.

"Ummm...no?...Look, Marlene I know you're concerned, but I can't help myself okay. I know it seems like I'm letting myself being trodden on and crushed by a DUDE-"

"Yes! It's un-feminist!" Marlene interrupted, not sure where lily was going with this, but sure that these words will impact her.

"-Ughh will you listen to me?" Lily said, slightly annoyed. She took a deep breath.

"Look, you know me. I'm the fiery red-head who's not afraid of hexing anyone that tries to hurt her or anyone else. Who guys are afraid of asking out because they fear they'll mess up in a way that'll make me set them on fire or something. But it's not  
like that Marlene. I know myself,too. I know I can't bear to leave things like this, even with someone who hurt my feelings with the cruelest insult in the handbook. I've already covered snape in boils to get my revenge - note to self: that was an  
awesome spell and I'm gonna have to write it down- but I also know that I would never hold such a long grudge to anyone. And I'm DEFINITELY not gonna be affected by the words of someone who doesn't mean anything to me now."

"Well, NOW maybe, but he was your best friend back then Lils, even though I don't like to admit it, and those words cut you back then and you know it. I'm

Just saying: no need to pick at the scar." Marlene said, doubting that Lily was as non-chalant as she seemed, but wanting to be reassured all the same.

"Sticks and stones, Mar, sticks and stones. There is no scar, because all I need to do is set my affairs straight in such a way, that when I leave school, I have no fears or regrets or even memories that I'm gonna remember as anything but good. Because  
we're going out in a terrifying world, and we're gonna need these memories to not forget the reason for which we are fighting, and will be fighting for probably our whole lives. And so, I need to talk to him, at least one last time, and find out if  
he was worth this long speech. He seems sorry and I need to know that he knows what he did to me, and then we can both move on with the lives we have chosen." Lily explained, out of breath and very emotional.

"Ohhh Lils...I didn't know you felt that way. It's okay, you don't have to convince me. It's something you just have to do." Marlene said, reassured and on the verge of jumping on her best friend and hugging the shit out of her.

"It's something I just have to do..." Lily mumbled, realising it was.

"Ohh Sirius. That feels so good. Ah yeahhhh." Claudia, a girl from Ravenclaw, moaned, relishing the kisses that the esteemed Sirius Black was planting on her neck. Sirius was only kind of enjoying himself, he liked and respected Claudia as a girl, but  
he was just not feeling "it" as a girlfriend. But obviously he had to fulfil the 3-date rule which his best mates had implemented on his love life. It's was just a simple law that stated that Sirius Black has to go on at least 3 dates with any girl  
of his choosing when he chooses her (which meant when he kissed her in the Great Hall and asked for a dinner date) before he dumps her and moves on to the next girl. This was so he had the chance to get to know her before breaking up with her after  
the first night.

"BANG! BANG!" Somebody suddenly rammed at the door of their dorm, and yelled out,"SIRIUS BLACK I know you're in there so come out! James needs you!"

Sirius, although feeling bad for leaving Claudia, jumped up at once and bowed to the disappointed girl on the bed in front of him.

"Sorry, m'lady. But my bro needs me and it's my duty. I'll see you later okay."

And with that he opened the door to a very out-of-breath and flushed Remus.

"What wrong? Who has caught him now? I TOLD him not to use the invisibility cloak with more than 2 people in the daylight!" He ranted.

"No...no..." Remus panted. "Dude...he was checking the map for that..." He looked inside to see a very curious Claudia sitting on Sirius's bed half-naked. "...umm thing we were planning and he saw... Well..." He trailed off, looking in the  
distance sadly.

"What? Remus, what?!" Sirius asked seriously. (Lol)

"...he saw Lily trying to find Severus Snape."

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 **A/N: Thank you guys so much for sticking with me and reading this! This is just an expositional chapter because I know that just like me, you guys don't believe that Lily would ever let a guy hurt her and see another sunrise! But this needed to be done with Snape so I wanted it to be justified Whyy. Rate and Review please!**  
/ **Yours with coffee and late-night writing,**

 **Anushka**


	8. Chapter 8

_**Disclaimer-**_ **All the characters in this story belong to the queen JKR. Only the story and the plot line is written by me.**

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"What do you mean, TRYING to find Snape? How did he see her trying to do something I'm pretty sure she wouldn't have declared to him before going off?" Sirius asked, extremely suspicious.  
"Well..." Remus stuttered a bit, in reply to which Sirius groaned.  
"Oh god was James stalking her again?" He asked, a bit too casually to be healthy.  
"Oh Sirius don't act like you don't know how much he loves seeing Lils talking to herself while she walks around the castle. He says it's a "window to her soul" when she thinks she's alone, and don't worry, we're working on making sure he doesn't  
grow up into a psychopath. But...that's not the issue here." He said, brushing off the serious implications of their best friend being a potential maniac.  
"Oh...okay. Where is James then?" A partially pacified Sirius inquired, and upon seeing the guilty yet dubiously sad look on Remus's puppy face, he grew panicked.  
"Oh shit Remus what did you tell him to do to handle his problem? Shit, where is he? He didn't kill Snape did he? Did YOU tell him to kill Snape?"  
Sirius blubbered getting more hysterical at the thought of his best mate getting expelled for killing "that greasy slime ball" than he was at the thought of his best mate having murdered a person.  
"No...ugh, no Sirius calm down, would ya? If you don't like me treating you like a dog then don't force me to use the "bad Sirius, sit DOWN!" line on you again! It's nothing of that sort."  
Remus said, finally becoming his non-panicked, sensible, mom-of-the-group usual self again.  
"Well I wouldn't have minded the killing Snape part but okay."Sirius muttered discontentedly, indignant at being told to "sit DOWN" like a dog but sitting down all the same.  
"Okay, I'm going to begin at the beginning. You know how James has been trying to be his best self lately, and not just trying but succeeding and actually transforming for the better?" He continued as he saw Sirius nod despondently. "Well...today,  
I told him to finally make a move and ask Lilyout for the Hogsmease visit this weekend. I did my best to convince him, I gave my best 'you can do it' speech and I yelled ''she won't say no' a hundred times, and at the end, he was convinced."  
"Well, that's GOOD. I don't like the transformation part, but the building up his confidence part can' only be good." Sirius said, knowing that the story hadn't ended. "Well it doesn't end here!" Remus said, predictablyannoyed. "Well,James was  
pondering over the map a while ago to, you know, find a place for our "voyage" tonight as wild animals, and he spotted Lily pacing the common room like there was no tomorrow. So of course, he went there shrouded in the cloak, and there he overheard  
her muttering about "finding Severus" and "talking about us" and "talking to Severus" which ruffled his forever ruffled feathers even more.  
But...when he hadspotted her on that map, he hadreally made up his mind to actually go and talk to her about him and her and THEM, and thenhe goes there and finds her talking to herself about SNAPE..."  
Sirius paled.  
"...and he gets totally crushed." Sirius sighed heavily.  
"And id been drilling for hours that I had seen her change towards him too, and she might really say yes to him, and that "all his hard work was finally paying off"! Ugh! Why did I open my big fat Wolfy mouth!?" Remus cried in anguish, imagining  
all James' hope crashing once again to square one.  
"Oh Remus no, you were just doing the duty we both should've been doing. I wasn't there Cauz I was ...urghm... Busy, but it's not your fault!" Sirius petted Remus, only a little bit satisfied when he realised he was getting his back for the dog  
treatment before.  
"Thanks Padfoot, but I think it's time we go find him and stop him from doing anything stupid to himself or to Snape, and ruining his chances with Re- umm LILY forever, because that's what I'm most afraid of."  
Meanwhile Lily had been wandering the whole province under which the castle came, but Severus Snape was still suspiciously absent. It wouldn't have anything to do with a certain James potter using a certain map belonging to a certain group of marauders  
to hide underneath a certain invisibility cloak to irk a certain Severus Snape so much that he would get up from his sedentary and move away to a safer place, right as lily was about to turn the corner and spot him. Well, it didn't have anything  
to do with that as far as Lily Evans was concerned.  
As he turned yet another corridor to follow Lily around in his state of woe, he crashed into 2 boys who had been running in an equal state of woe.  
"JAMES!"  
"SIRIUS!"  
"JAMES!"  
"REMUS!"  
"WHY are we yelling?"  
"Well, James..." Sirius began tentatively.  
"...we were looking to see if you needed calming down or some chocolate from Remus secret stash underneath his bed that he pretends he doesn't have..." Remus looked abashed. "...and we wanted to know if you actually know what you'll do when you  
find her...?"  
They looked at him expectantly.  
"Well, if you must know, I don't care where she's going or what she's doing. I'm not trying to find her or talk to her about ANYthing..."James said, trying to push off the nervous tremors in his voice.  
All of a sudden, all his being steadfastedly focused on the map he was holding, and his eyes could have lit that castle on fire then and there with the flare they ignited.  
"She found him."

* * *

 **A/N: I'm so sorry for such a long delay guys, but I was absolutely SWAMPED with exam fever. I'm feeling more and more like a little child playing in the corner of JKR's huge sandbox, but since this is my first fanfic, be gentle! :) Rate and Review please, it would help me so much!**

 **Yours with sleep-deprived eyes and tons of math homework,**

 **Anushka**


	9. Chapter 9

**_FLEE_**

 ** _She ran. Her face down, her teeth clenched, her eyes slits, she ran. Ran with her ears ringing and her eyes watering and her hands trembling, ran with the force of her pain, loss...and a little bit of relief. the frost of September was a steady and comforting_** **crunch** _ **under her feet, the biting wind prominent on her face. She willed herself not to think, not to feel, not to drown in the swirl of a whirlwind that was her mind...her heart...her being. Just listen. Just feel the miniscule sting of the raging, furious cold. Just run, and never reach, and never stop.**_

 _ **He ran. With heartbreak, with bitterness... and a little bit of recklessness. The flashing of the piercing, burning image playing like a broken loop of a broken record in a broken heart. Questions so vengeful, that his mind refused to co-operate and just...stop. Stop the stream of thoughts. So he ran, too, feeling the same fierce yet peaceful piercing of the wind and hearing the same frost shatter into pieces beneath his shoes.**_

 _"She found him."_

 _Words broke through his annoyance at his best friends and his mild panic turned into full-blown hair-frazzling insanity. His eyes found her immediately on the map, his quick brain already formulating the shortest route to her, his athletic legs already starting to prance away._

 _"Prongs, you fucking moron! Stop making me run, it isn't good for my health!" Sirius yelled, worrying slightly about his well-being and slightly more about what his best friend might find upon their arrival. "Lets go!", were Remus's sharp words, thinking the same thing._

 _"Well, well, well...if it isn't the famous-for-confounding-Filch Marauders after all!" Sneered a voice out of nowhere, clutching at James and almost choking him with the force of his neck. Filch stepped out and immediately surrounded the boys, and began ṭo scold them roundly for one or the other mischief they denied ever doing but as sure as McGonagall was badass, it was them._

 _"Okay this might be a good thing. If Lily actually wants to make up with that greaseball, this is as good a way as any to stop James from witnessing it and blowing his top," were the whispered words of a tired looking Remus._

 _James did exactly that the very next second. "Look i don't have TIME for this! I have a potential CRISIS, for crying out loud! If i don't get there in time to cover Snape in boils- balls and all- then...i might- I just do NOT have time for this!"_

 _With this slightly confusing explosion, he started running again, a frustrated Sirius and an exasperated Remus on his trail._

 _Lily walked defiantly towards the black haired, hooked nosed, rather batty looking boy in the distance. Her resolve was wearing off, but she knew she needed the closure of having settled things with Snape more than she could describe._

 _Snape looked around at her footsteps, his face becoming a shadow of his old self, the self that raised an 11 year old witch's confidence in herself, rather than the Sallow-faced him, sullen and villainous -looking, but lasting just for the second it took Lily to reach him and start pacing with agitation._

 _"Look, things between us are in no unclear way Okay, and they'll never be, just so you know. I'm not here to make things between us like they were before, not even to make it okay, but just because I can't move on and be happy till all is said and done, and all were left with is a memory, of good AND bad days. I'm done with being the one who always finishes the arguement, who always stops the fight before it gets out of hand and who always, always wanted things to be good, even when they weren't, and never could be."_

 _"So listen Snape, I forgive you. I do. Don't look so hopeful, asshole, I am a good person, and that's still as far as I can go. What you did, not only the whole name-calling and hate-crime thing,_ _but the damage to our friendship, was horrible, and painful, but I'm glad you did it anyway. It made me realise what I was turning a blind eye on for this long, long ever. people change, Severus. And now that I see you with the innocent eye of my 11 year old self, I can fathom just how much you are not Snape, THE Snape that was...that was there for me. You are a shadow, and that realisation makes it so much easier to let you go, and be happy."_

 _"So yeah, in no way am I your friend, or even acquaintance, but it's safe to say that the intense wish I've been overcome with to hex you into your next, pitiful life, has been calmed. That is, no longer will I hex you because you hurt me, but I still fully concur, and in no way should I be unclear, I will fight you and I will win if I see you hurting someone else, if I ever see your bigoted, hateful actions that I've been ignoring again."_

 _Now Her eyes softened, and so did her voice._

 _"You were always my best friend Severus, the difference is that I can't really see him in you right now. But you are a good person turning dark, I just wished I hadn't been blind all these years and seen it earlier, because even my self 2 months ago would've done everything in her power to stop it. Now...now I'm just letting go._

 _Goodbye, Severus."_

 _Turning away, she could hear the sound of a heart breaking, and decided that her former best friend, not deserving of her forgiveness in the least, still deserved a last comfort, a lasting kindness. She turned back..._

 _...And James arrived on the fateful spot, panting._

 _He stood stunned, unable to believe this, this evidence that the world must surely be spinning, out of control, wild, furious, chaotic._

 _"How-" He cut himself off, unable to finish his thought, let alone his sentence._

 _"DID she just HUG HIM?!" blurted out Sirius, before falling into a shocked silence._

 _Silently turning his back on his 2 equally stunned but more mindful best friends eyeing him warily..._

 _He ran, never letting the pain spill._ _She ran, never letting the tears fall._

 _Frantic...rugged...feral...they ran towards each other, away from each other._

 **Hey guys! Thanks to all you guys soooooooo much for all the immense, intense and kind of scary support you're giving my lazy, unforgivably late ass! I'm hugely sorry and have no excuse except... SCHOOL! But to that one fanboy who reviewed... thanks dude, for being patient and unknowingly reminding me how much people actually care! A big big gigantic thanks for all of you who read, reviewed and kept me from falling into writer's block and...well...making me more happy than i deserve after your patience! I know I'm a big liar but once again, I'll really try to be frequent, if not regular!**

 **Hugs and Happy tears and Curses for school,**

 **Anushka**


	10. Chapter 10

_"Yeah, okay, so I got a little carried away" James declared to the groaning boys in his dormitory at 3 am that night. "It's not like I care!" he added viciously._

 _"Yeah, it's not like you care, and it's not like Sirius gasped dramatically like a girl when they hugged, and it's not like you haven't said this exact sentence a - a shit ton of times since then!" Remus groaned, sitting up in his bed. "It was a hug, prongs, let it go."_

 _"Lupin! Do not pretend you don't understand why I'm upset...I mean, I'm totally not upset about it, I couldn't care less...but you know as well as I do that Lily hugging Snape could NOT and IS not a good thing! It could mean anything, that she forgives him, that he won her valuable friendship back without suffering horribly at the bottom of hell...or that she-" he choked a little, "likes him."_

 _"Yeahh it's not like you care." smirked Remus._

 _"Sirius, won't you for heavens sake tell him that it's nothing?" he said, turning to Sirius in exasperation._

 _"Oh no, apparently I'm too dramatic for the dynamic of this group, so I'll be just quiet here, not caring about anything, even though I find it outrageous that she even went near the swine, let alone talk to him, and I feel totally betrayed on James' part, especially since it FINALLY felt like he was making progress with her after 6 years of half-assed proposals followed by lily whopping his ass followed by multiple, complete and utter meltdowns." Sirius muttered, half in his sleep and half in the immense amount of emotions he was drowning in on behalf of his best friend._

 _James groaned, lying on his bed with his head in his hands and legs splayed out, all theatrics with a trace of utter desperation._

 _"Not helping, black." whispered Remus, rolling his eyes._

 _"Look! Look at her! She's completely fine after yesterday! Doesn't give a shit about the felony she committed! How am I supposed to imagine our wedding day in peace if she keeps bringing a curtain of greasy hair in between our lips every time we lean in for a kiss?!" James whispered furiously, looking at the red-haired witch laughing and talking with her girlfriends at the breakfast table. Sirius choked on his sausage and gagged a bit._

 _"Keep bringing up a curtain of greasy hair while I eat, why don't you?" He began, but as he glanced at his best friends miserable expression, something snapped inside him, the brotherhood he had for James hating Snape, hating Lily for whatever reason she even went near him, his endearment for Lily knowing there must be a good reason, but still hating how James couldn't stop caring if he tried._

 _"Prongs, it's over. Get up."_

 _Remus surreptitiously glanced at Sirius, apprehensive of the determination in his voice, but at the same time reassured that he had thought of a plan._

 _James broke out of his bubble of misery and looked hopefully at his best mate, too convinced that he was either going to help him, or get him shit-faced drunk. Hoping for the latter, he got up and followed Sirius's determined footsteps out of the Great Hall and said slowly, "Sure Padfoot, what're you thinking? Conjured whiskey or muggle bar? Conjured alcohol has its kick but the mopey atmosphere of the bar is what I-"_

 _"Forget about her."_

 _James stopped mid-sentence, and, pretending he hadn't heard, said loudly,_

 _"What're you talking about, I'm going to marry her aren't I?"_

 _"No James, you've had enough false hope and wishful thinking. *I* have had enough of seeing you get hurt every time she TALKS to some other bloke, and frankly, although it was enjoyable, I'm tired of seeing those guys get hurt "by accident" every time you find out too. You both deserve to be happy, and I can't see you unhappy anymore. I still think you might've had a chance, and I still think you do, but it doesn't seem worth it seeing you suffer over and over again, and denying her the chance to be happy with-" he whispered now, "-someone else. So do it. Forget her."_

 _James blanched, shocked at this speech. This was the guy who had vowed to be his wingman until the day he got to be his best man, and planned a whole ceremony around it in second year? But then the last words registered in his numb brain, and he scoffed._

 _"You think it's that easy? It's not it's a break up, and I can just find a rebound girl and hope that my feelings get sidetracked enough for me to move on...what?" Sirius had suddenly grinned, as the first step to seeing his best mate happy was handed to him on a silver platter. He thumped James on the back._

 _"That's exactly what you're gonna do mate."_

 _"So how did it go with Snape, Lils?" Marlene asked, observing that Lily had not heard a word she had been saying till then, and had distractedly laughed at her describing the old man's wife dying in the movie she saw last night. "Huh?...oh. Oh! It went pretty smoothly, actually a LOT more than I had planned for! Maybe that's because I didn't wait for him to reply to my speech once I finished it, and ran the fuck away...but I got it over with, and now I'm ready to move on."_

 _Marlene clapped her hands together in excitement. "Oh goody! Finally I get to see Lily losing her virginity...that's what you meant right?" She inquired, but seeing green eyes glare at her, she backtracked, "okay okay, although you can't deny the weirdness of EVERY guy who asked you out ending up in the hospital wing, with either purple spots, or green skin, and a strict aversion to red hair...sorry! Ow!" She laughed as Lily punched her arm, while also wondering the exact same thing._

 _"Okay, in all seriousness, do you have someone in mind?" She finally said, realising Lily was earnest._

 _Lily glanced at the seat that had emptied suddenly, a seat she had been sneaking peeks at all morning, a seat whose occupants were glancing at her from outside the great hall right that moment, a seat from which a certain James Potter had been secretly peering at her as she distractedly buttered her toast._

 _"You know, I just might..."_

 _Aaaaaah you probably know what I'm going to say...THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR SUPPORT and I'm so soo sorry I've been M.I.A for so long, with absolutely no excuse except...school! Exams! And I'm posting this through the website instead of the app like usual so forgive me if there's format problems...And ultimately I cannot thank you enough for your feedback, simply because I cannot explain how much it means to me. So anyway, read and review! :D_

 _With Coffee and Sleepless Nights,_

 _-Anushka_


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